new home, new life

for a moment now I have a new web-home - www.theparasoldiaries.blogspot.com

come visit me :)

ra-ra-rawww

there's always a first time. my first visit to a raw food restaurant - the only raw food restaurant in Riga (as far as I know). it was.... interesting. and "interesting" is not entirely a camouflaged "inedible" this time. on the side of friendly catch up chat I had a gazpacho. I expected something red ant tomato-loaded. it was green. a cucumber mush with a sprinkle of sun dried tomatoes, walnuts and some cut up vegetables - sad little pieces of cucumber and tomato. while the tomatoes and nuts lasted it was quite ok, but the green ... should I say "soup".... on its own - not my cup of tea. the bread (dried, not baked) was rather tasty, and the dessert was surprisingly delicious - cold, sweet, with mango slices. mmm. that I could actually order again some time. if I ever go there again that is.

on star stealers and would-be kings

on a day like this I wish I could just put everything down in the best and worst dear diary traditions. Some of my favourite and most respected online authors (sounds better than bloggers to my ear) write about awkward dates, silly arrogant morons, trembling hearts, weak knees, distasteful liars and embarrassing encounters. I don't have the lightness of hand to do that. instead I just listen to princess of china again and again. Coldplay and Rihanna can seem a very unlikely match at first, but they are so good together.

the age of sleep

they always say that you get less sleepy as you get older. even some people of 40 (!) say "you know, I don't need that much sleep longer, I get up earlier now, I sort of wish I could sleep more"
I usually joke about it and wonder when that "age" will come for me. because now it seems that I live in a continuous age of sleep, an era of cruel mornings, endless alarm snoozing and rushed make up. as I am getting older, it only gets worse, my nights are later and later, and mornings more and more difficult. as a kid, I used to be able to roll out of bed on Sunday mornings around 8 or 9 to watch some fairy tale films or cartoons, I took my blanket with me to the tv-sofa, snuggled up, and half slept through the movie. where did I get the motivation... now my weekend mornings don't start until past 11, if I don't have some earlier obligations. and I mean Obligations, that cannot be brushed off. world seems to function according to early risers and morning is the time when i most painfully realize that I am a creature of the night.

jävla hippie!*

on a day when work frustrations have reached yet another level, a handful of black-ish Swedish humour is just what the soul needs.

*damn hippie!

206th most feminine today

that is what urlai.com states in this report after a close up and personal analysis of my garden here. well, thank you for making me a couple of years younger, that will add some happy-tone points right there!




and I discovered urlai.com via The Kasper Stromman Design Blog which is a cool place.

what urlai.com had to say -





Iduns garden

divine adventures, earthly delights and everything in between 

 

Text analysis

idunsgarden.blogspot.com is probably written by a female somewhere between 18-25 years old. The writing style is personal and happy most of the time. 

Gender

Age

Mood

Tonality

Gender Ranking
idunsgarden.blogspot.com is the 206th most feminine blog of 928 ranked.

Mood Ranking

idunsgarden.blogspot.com is the 261th most happy blog of 928 ranked.

how I came to be Idun

from wiki

given my long lasting infatuation with old Norse mythology, it should be no wonder that I would choose to be one of the Norse goddesses. I have always liked Idun (Iðunn) - she is kind and wise and beautiful (just like me, heh). and she will never grow old while she keeps enjoying those golden apples, but alas, I will not be able to keep my youth forever. we even share the initial letter in our names.

there is one point of disagreement though - her flimsy husband, Bragi the harp playing skjald. moody and irresponsible musicians have never been my "type", not even when I was 13. I would much rather have someone like Njord - a well grounded bloke who lives by the sea and likes it as much as I do.

can I wake up tomorrow?

in case I haven't mentioned it - I am an escapologist. and I contradict myself at times. I tried out tumblr just to see that it doesn't really fit. I like my job, but don't seem to be able to be productive lately. it s so difficult to define something alive, isn't it.
oh, do I need to vent… to let the steam out. my failures to become successfully anonymous and/or anonymously successful have a reason. they must have a reason. I am bad at structure, even worse at defining my theme, my song, my colour, my favourite tv show and my fragrance. definition is so restricting and finite. after finite it becomes boring, plain and at last - untrue. because my truth will always have that “and…”, that “if…”, that “however…”. and that is not a good definition. so why define, why be good at it? why strive? 

kitty from here

because definition is required. continuity is definition, regularity is definition, consistency is definition. definition good, uncertainty - bad. that is how we operate as a society. hell, that is how I operate too. when I watch annoying episodes of SATC or GA, where people don’t define although it is all clear. I am all for clarity, clearly defined relationships, clear rules. clear. good - bad. and I cannot be good in my own book if cannot conform to this. and I never will be able to be defined, clear cut and finite. I am me. life is not tv, and life online is a buffet - I can be as finite as I wish to be. does that mean I am dishonest? yes, I am selective. selectively undefined, thus more true to myself. it makes things complicated, it makes things messy, it discourages to continue. and then I fail. again and again. but does that stop me? hasn’t stopped yet… I want to explore and try to define. define parts, put them together, take them apart and reconstruct. I want to play, still. forget the failure, forget the impossibility of definition. because how else am I supposed to go on?

a little list

On one of my favourite blogs, the splendid and quick witted Karin published a question-answer list that I quite liked, no questions like "album of the year" or any nonsense like that. So, I thought I would just jot down some points on my 2011. Hope I can refrain from paraphrasing Karin too much, because some of her answers are so well put and recognizable. 

here goes.

1. Did you do something this year that you hadn't done before?

but of course! Sailed on a yacht, saw Klimt's "Kiss" behind the glass, visited new places, got a job that I really really like.

2. did you keep any of your New Year's resolutions?

didn't make any in the first place, so, definitely, I've kept them all ;)

3. did anyone close toy you die this year?

No, thankfully.

4. which countries did you visit?

For the first time - Slovakia, Austria. Again and again - Denmark. 

5. what made you feel good?

so many things, being with my loved ones, traveling, doing nothing, being busy, sunsets, sunrises, cold mojitos and warm cocoa. the lot.

6. did you miss something that you want to have next year?

jah, the usual - better health, more money, more and better romance.

7. biggest success.

probably the job that I am happy to go to and glad to talk about.

8. biggest mistake.

placing too high hopes on people and on self, that (of course) leads to disappointment.

9. have you been sick and/or injured yourself?

I've had a couple of traditional colds and struggled along with long-term conditions.

10. best purchase.

plane tickets? 

11. what did you spend most of your money on?

probably traveling, practical household expenses. 

12. did something make you really happy?

the small things, the little things, the things from Q #5

13. what songs will remind you of this year?

various songs by Nik & Jay, Sara Bareilles and Burhan G, not necessarily all from 2011.

14. were you happier or sadder compared to the year before?

happier, so much happier.

15. what do you wish you had done more of?

could have taken better care of myself, practically. planned things better.

16. what do you wish you had done less of?

shouldn't have daydreamed quite so much probably.

17. favourite tv show.

the old favourites - friends for millionth time, it crowd, black books, desperate housewives. almost all non-current.

18. something you wished for and got for your birthday?

didn't actually wish for anything particular, but got a lovely time with friends, some flowers and some nice presents.

19. what did you do on your birthday?

went to work and had a quiet dinner with friends in the evening.

20. is there anything that could make your life even better?

here I have to steal Karin's answer - yes, but those things are not (at least not entirely) up to me.

21. your style this year.

hmm, style? slightly bohemian comfort with a touch of the quirky.

22. which celeb have you been most keen on? *a bit poor wording here

hehe, I have always been a bit keen on Nik & Jay I guess. there, I said it!

23. whom did you miss?

sometimes someone I shouldn't be missing. sometimes my good friends who live far away.

24. motto of the year.

this is difficult, don't have any, retrospectively - be grateful and embrace.

25. obsession of the year.

gelato and beauty blogs.

26. the best film.

I've seen quite many films this year.. King's Speech was great. Midnight in Paris - painfully enchanting.

27. biggest news.

I don't pursue news, just can't escape. all the horrible things were quite big this year, but I rather want to remember something good.

28. the trend of the year.

I am really NOT the person to know about trends. have no clue. my trend this year was more colour in appearance. quite loved it.

29. the biggest fear

health things, age things, the flow of time. but I want to work past those and just embrace life.

30. what do you want to make of next year?

I want to have another great year. to experience, discover, achieve, enjoy, improve, taste, feel, smell, touch, see and hear. I want to travel somewhere I've never been before (maybe even 2 somewheres), meet people I have not met for a while. Do something I enjoy, get better at things, be free, inspired and happy. I want so much! and somehow I believe that it is all possible. not because it is 2012, but because it is this moment, this place in my life.

via weheartit

the tricky thing is to get used to '12. a new number, a new 365 366 days to live, enjoy, succeed in or gloriously fuck up, 366 days to work hard, play harder, chill softly and just be alive in. 

frankly, I don't really understand the hype about new beginnings and resolutions. my resolutions appear and are being cancelled on each, every and any calendar day of the year. but even I can succumb to pressure, after all there are certain things you are supposed to do - watch Irony of Fate on the telly, which is briefly interrupted by President's speech and fireworks. 

This New Year, however, was a bit different for me. I had of course watches fireworks by our freedom lady, but I had never had champagne right there on the spot. I have never gone on a pub/club crawling tour afterwards either. It was fun and different. And made me revisit and re-appreciate my usual way of life.

So - no resolutions, no lists, my life is far too determined by deadlines and schedules as it is. Just some agreements that have to be kept and above all a promise to self. to be.

'tis the time

Yesterday was the proper winter solstice, one of the occasions where the Latvian language has managed to keep a bit of the heathen vibe of the days before the German crusaders came along and inroduced Christmas. Linguistically the word "Christmas" in Latvian - Ziemassvētki - has nothing to do with christianity, literally it means "the celebration of winter", the word was kept from the heathen vocabulary.

so, yesterday we were supposed to celebrate winter (if we were to be proper heathen Latvians that is) but not just in any random manner,  our ancestors were particular about certain things. and they did know how to have fun.

Here are the things to do at solstice/Christmas eve/sometimes New Year's eve by extension - choose what suits best for you.

To ensure prosperity you have to serve 9 or even 12 courses on your festive gathering. So to be completely sure, one might just as well throw all 15 courses in, just for good measure.

If "prosperity" seems too broad and obscure, and your wishes are quite straight forward, say "lots of money in the next year!", there are still a couple of thing you can do. For example take a black cat and carry it around a church, here some of the directions are more specific - you have to go 3 full laps around the said church, according to some. In some other versions of this belief, you would have to be naked at the time.

In case the cat escapes, you can still attract more money by eating peas (one of the most popular dishes on the celebration table - peas with diced ham) using hands - that will ensure handfuls of money in the coming year.

collage from polyvore

And such simple action as not spending all you have on the solstice eve, should make sure you don't run out of money. Very rational.

The greatest wealth, however, is good health and there are also ways to ensure that as well on this magical night. To avoid toothache, you have to run barefoot 3 times around your house. Should keep the dentist away.

But are people ever happy just with handfuls of money and strong teeth? No, they want more. They always want to know the future. And even that is possible on this special night. 

It is said that at midnight horses (sometimes also cows, sheep and other farm animals) talk about future in human voices, so you have to hide somewhere in the stable/cowshed and listen in. Hiding is very important, should the animals see you, they would talk crap about your future; or in worst variations of this - you would turn into a horse or cow. That's right!

Another, probably less stressful, option is to go to a crossroads and stand there, then you will know all that is to happen the next year. 

If you are too lazy to go that far, you can just briskly run barefoot around your house 3 times and look into one of the windows, and you will see the future. *this can be successfully combined with the teeth-healthcare routine, I think. Oh, yes, and in some variations of this again - you will have to be completely naked, not just barefoot. And the naked thing works for the crossroad stunt as well. 

But is plain old future-knowing good enough I might ask again? Not if you happen to be an unmarried girl it isn't. Because all the future you want to know is when and to whom you will be married the coming year. Fear not, there are ways to know that as well.

If you happen to be with your unmarried girlfriends, you can do some of these activities together and compare results. One method I love - you draw twigs from the broom or the twig heap by the fireplace (because everybody has heaps of twigs sitting around in their homes nowadays). If you get a firm and tall twig, you will marry a tall, well built and wealthy guy. If your twig is small, crooked and overly dry - your suitor will be not so well-off, not very handsome and might be old as well. Sizist attitude to twigs, but should be fun.

To know whether you or any of your friends will get married the next year, you have to turn your backs to the door and throw one shoe back across your shoulder. If your shoe lands with toe pointing towards the door, you will be married before long. To see who will marry first, see which shoe lands closest to the door.

If you already have a boyfriend and want to see if you will stay together, pour two drops of candle wax into a bowl of water and see if they meet and melt together. If they do, so will you. If not, well, maybe go draw a twig...

There is also one for the lazy ones - just go to sleep and remember whom you dream about. The guy who will hand you a shirt in the dream will be The One.

I can't help but wonder if people really managed to do all this and follow through with a dozen of other solstice traditions and prepare those insane meals and get on with daily tasks.

Today we are somewhere between  this, the christian Christmas, tangerines, mass produced Santa outfits and home made Christmas-tree  decorations. The joys of being Latvian in the 21st century.

Happy Holidays!

midnight in broad daylight

one of the things you can do on a date? yes, see a film. traditional, I know, but then - I like it old school. and my date with KBH had its movie. Midnight in Paris. Woody Allen. need I say more.... *sigh

lovely, exactly lovely it was. Allen's love affair with Paris is not unlike my affair(s) with KBH. and don't we all recognize this search for the perfect place, the golden time and a long forgotten diary that holds all the answers to the questions we haven't asked yet.  we all know this  obnoxious guy who knows everything. and perplex situations, dear me, are we ever in want of those? but despite all that we still see what life is really about - laughter, champagne and la belle époque of now.

one woman's struggle with Dior - or - getting the executive groove on

We go way back - Copenhagen and I, we've been casual about it, infatuated, giving each other the silent treatment, falling desperately into each others arms, you know, the lot. I have always had that "butterflies in the tummy" feeling when getting ready for a date with Copenhagen, I have been obsessing and plotting agendas. this weekend date however  was all fun, no clingy thoughts, no demands "like me, want me, desire me Copenhagen, I did my make up just for you". instead I did my make up for me, for me only, and we had a date, just had some fun, some chai latte and it was good. a date when you just relax and enjoy the feeling of everything just being as it has to be. because you are destined for each other, no agendas, no checklists, just being in the moment. Copenhagen took me by the hand and smiled its wickedly charming smile.

from here

and what do you do after a good date? yes, you go berserk in the duty free shopping area at the airport. or at least I did. now I am a proud owner of Clinique "eye definition" set and a set of Dior miniatures - delightful little buggers, as on the picture. 

I do love miniature perfumes, even though you have to risk it - sometimes some of the little bottles are not meant to be opened. luckily, after some struggling, I managed to open and sniff all 5 of the little Diors, they all smell as they should (isn't that lucky). some of these will now be my executive perfumes, for times when I need all the executive attitude I can get, like tomorrow. back to work, back into the groove. groove on!

in a few hours I will get into a green car and be off to RIX. there is no agenda this time, but I know I will ache. just a little. like people who want children ache when they look at a toddler. but having no agenda makes it a bit easier, it welcomes pleasant surprises. I have just decided to be. just like that.

this, Idun, is the Internet!

two boys, an electric drill and a roll of optical cable at Idun's place? that can only mean one thing - I have entered the land of brand new, swooosh, hold on to your hats, I-cannot-believe-how-fast-this-is Internet. and treated myself to a new browser too, busy busy day. 

a still from IT Crowd, season 3 episode 4

   but wait! that's not all - I (the person who has never really gotten the point of all the tweet madness, and is still somewhat puzzled) have joined the evergrowing tweeting community. I don't know how often I will tweet and I certainly hope I'm not becoming a twit by doing that. there's a pun right there, hah! but without further ado, let me document - I am now on twitter. or rather the garden is on twitter. I have to confess - this happened because I read someplace that tweeting about your blog (or blogging about your tweets? retweeting your blog posts? posting your tweets? confused!) should make your blog better, whatever that entails. it brings your blog to the public, gives you a channel of interaction with your community etc etc. well, for someone who is reluctant to call her garden a blog in the first place this is a huge leap.
   I am not sure of most of the terms used in that blog improvement article. there's the paradox with blogging - although I do enjoy the process of writing, the pressure of definition, stats hunt and all that is just too much. and too little, curiously. why blog if you don't want anyone to read it? obviously, if you want to keep things secret you write in a notebook protected by a heart shaped padlock. some online writers have even called it hypocrisy when people say that they blog for themselves. logically enough, if you publish, you intend for your publications to be read.
I don't think writing for oneself and for others is incompatible, in fact I believe that even writing for others you write first of all for yourself. but where do I stand on this, with tweets and all? a proper blog-blog is like a drawing pinned on the board - see, I made this! I am more of a -this is what I draw, take a look if you want to- sort of person. therefore not a "proper blogger" in my understanding, just exploring my blog as I write. and you can join me if you like. tweet tweet!

a question that will free my mind, vol. 2

a 50 part quest to free my mind. question for this time - #40, absolutely not my favourite one, if I just might add.

so, here goes:

When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?

firstly it would only be fair to admit that I'm not big on marching as such, let alone marching into somewhere, especially the dark. or maybe I have not been lucky enough to have strong beliefs in faint ideas that have soft glow. if I believe in an idea, for me it is more just a soft glow, it is at least a rather strong torchligt. if it is a soft glow, I don't believe enough. and I have to believe enough to walk, or march if you please, into places.

but anyhow, the last time I did it in a big way was a bit more than 3 years ago. unfortunately, belief is not always enough, even if you believe enough...I had to return because my torchlight was not a sufficiently strong companion in the dark. and it was probably all for the best, it has lead me to where I am now, and that is a good place to be. in a smaller way, I have been walking through dull darkness for 1 year, 2 months and 1 day, in a soft light of a belief that this darkness will end. and end it did. however I have to say again - this walk was not in vain, apart from being a path to the place I am now, it brought things and people in my life that I am grateful for.

that's it, no juicy details, just philosophic babble. heh, that's me, deal with it ;)

I don't know why they do it or Sunday lunch. or - sweet and sour candy

today however, I was in for a quite different cinematic experience. after a catch up lunch with a friend, we went to see a "chick flick" to rest our minds and enjoy a wee bit of harmless, cliché fun. or so I thought.



poster from imdb

I Don't Know How She Does It (2011). the cast was, of course, brilliant. a lovely surprise - Christina Hendricks outside MadMen (she is amazingly beautiful and an immensly skillful actress to my mind). so at least the story was well played, and always nice to get a glimpse of Mr. Bond Pierce Brosnan (and in a suit too, mmm). some mildly funny (in an American kind of way) jokes, S.J. Parker as bubbly as ever. but the story, ach, the story. clearly, a woman who is good at her job and doesn't want to leave it is a selfish bitch. while she's spreading herself out thinner than paper to juggle career, tofu and lice, her poor husband is the suffering hero of the piece, along with the spoilt offspring of course. all the while she is beating herself up about various things. at last, when a big work project is successful and she realizes: "oh, I CAN say no to something and try not to please everybody around me while becoming a wreck!" she rushes off to build a snowman. about the same time as the suffering husband realizes: "hey, why don't I take some responsibility for the daily chores and our marriage too?", the husband is of course the knight in shining armour, everybody is happy. the end.

and I am well aware that this text leaks bitter irony, just a teensy little bit. I know. but stories like this just wind me up. on the plus side - the "documentary" comments really voiced some worthy points.

Baltic Pearl, pt II

a mid-September Saturday evening is the right time to see some cinema at the oldest moving picture theater in town, yes? that's why I put my boots on and went in to see Bertie and Elizabeth (2002), another movie brought to us by Baltic Pearl 2011.

poster from imdb

Although presented as "The King's Speech, the beginnings" in some press material (and I loved The King's Speech), it was a different experience, not totally, but still. my intention was not comparative analysis or quest for historical accuracy, I just sat back and enjoyed. and there was plenty to enjoy - the interiors, settings, costumes, the English accent and subtle humour, but that was just the fine wrapping paper around an amazing love story that endures time, war and family conflicts. a touching tenderness and great persistance. even if I don't agree with the main characters on each and every matter, even if theirs is not my own dream relationship (but then again, what is?), even then I reserve the right to shed a tiny tear when Bertie and Elizabeth exchange glances across the room and all is clear. their glances are subtle, yet they reveal everything. this is where I reach for a kleenex and discretely dab it against the corner of my eye.

so, has the flat been cleaned/organised? have the pictures been sorted? has the laundry been done? no!

instead, I have scrolled through the usual blogs that i read, enjoyed a nice improvised mozarella salad and of course the movie one can never have too much of - Julie and Julia.

tonight I will again be at the Baltic Pearl, different screen this time, and different film. excited? yes!

so I compromised - I became a writer and a patient

since I am too lazy to sort out Vienna/Bratislava pictures yet, I will rather write about the moving pictures of tonight - Everyone Says I Love You, a creation of Woody Allen from the far away year 1996. I had never seen it, a shameful fact that was corrected tonight, thank you Baltic Pearl.

aaaand I absolutely loved it. I feel that I should confess - I have a soft spot for Allen generally, but come on - how can you not love all the flimsy, mildly awkward characters, the off key singing, undetectable time setting and the dialogues, oh the dialogues + bonus tracks: a singing Edward Norton, a flying Goldie Hawn and a Tim Roth that seduces a confused Drew Barrymore on a balcony. the whole film brims with Allen'esque sentences, the blondes are blond, the democrats are democrats and Venice is still above the water.

one of my favourite scenes. although I am not through with love just yet. warning - surreal dance moves.

video from the vaults of YouTube - here.

back.....on track?

back in Riga. the 15 degrees after constant +30 in Central Europe felt like a breath of fresh air (also literally) upon my arrival on Wednesday afternoon. a great week of intense laughter, conversations, hard core sightseeing and eating gelato like there's no tomorrow (seriously, is there such a thing as too much gelato, especially at +30?); followed by two days of doing nothing, a Friday evening cinema and high aspirations for the week to come (yeah, right!)

Brighter Planet's 350 Challenge

Brighter Planet's 350 Challenge

a word for Saturday

Your Word is Destiny

You are self confident and sure of yourself. You overlook your flaws... everyone has them. You are able to let go and just enjoy life. You feel like there's only so much you can control. When you set your mind to it, you can accomplish almost anything. You just need to believe in yourself. You are destined for greatness, but you don't let it go to your head. You just let life happen.

What's Your Word Right Now?

Blogthings: Discover the Parts of Your Personality that Have Been Hiding

 

the day of Saturn - the most structured and disciplined of the planets, yet, I feel like going with the flow. I have embarked on my project-vacation. at last! letting the time happen.

monsieur butterfly



poster from their page

Another "sensation" of semi-Latvian cinema, so, of course - I had to see it. in fact I cannot even call it semi-Latvian, because the cast and crew is pretty much a mix, real eurostyle. but the main character is Latvian and (logically enough) played by a Latvian actor, and this means only one thing - the still waters of Latvian cinema have been stirred a little. I, however, was far from stirred. Apart from Gundars Abolins' spectacular performance (a bit biased here - I love him, he is without a doubt one of the greatest actors in the little country of ours), there were not many things about this cinematic creation that I found enjoyable. the paradox is that G.Abolins was so believable and masterful in the role of this slimy, pathetic and greedy little man, that I became repulsed and annoyed by the protagonist almost instantly. but a movie still can be saved even if I don't particularly like the main character or relate a whole lot to the story. sadly, there must be more to a film than just one great performance and a couple of mildly amusing jokes. I suspect that the story was intended as a light hearted, ironic and fluttering comedy of adventure (hence the surname of the protagonist - Taurins - Latvian for butterfly). but at least with me this intetion did not fulfill its purpose. oh, well, better luck next time, I'm sure many people liked it anyway. still on in cinemas.



the infamous last week before vacation, the countdown has begun. and it doesn't have anything to do with hating ones work, because I quite love mine. at some point you just feel that everyone (first and foremost yourself) will be better off when you have recharged and gotten away a bit.

the vacation now seems like a bottomless bucket of raspberries. mmm.

say something nautical, dear

two weeks from now I will be somewhere else. also geographically. and although I will not be traveling  by sea, "ship ohoy" is the best phrase I can think of that would sum up my feeling s about it. Indian summer, a far away land and the company of a good friend. I have a lot to look forward to.

keep the rhythm

Today as I was sitting in the t-bus (or troll, as I say), and it accelerated from the stop just to halt again before a red light, I gazed out of the window, aimlessly. The radio was on, quite loudly and I noticed a passer by, a young woman, whose steps coincided exactly with the beat of the rather common song on the radio. and I felt like witnessing something special, like discovering a secret that last only for a moment and then is gone. her steps were made for this song and the song was tailored and timed so perfectly to her steps. yet she didn't hear the radio. and the driver had most probably not seen her on the pavement. and it doesn't matter that all this can be calculated and demistified in a most rational way. for that little moment I felt that there is always a song that matches our footsteps, even if we don't hear it, it is playing somewhere and or feet know it. and the song knows that somewhere we walk, strut, shuffle and prance its rhythm.

watermelons, raindrops and contentment

Today was a half crazy day at work, too little sleep, too much pressure and  slightly more chit chat that I like to take with my daily cup of vitamin B "ready for work". but on the way home a revelation occured to me - I still have about 1/3 of a watermelon in my fridge at home. and believe it or not, watermelon is a great remedy on a day like this, when everything is fine and ok, yet something gnaws from within, a bruised ego voices itself and that little bat of frustration flaps its wings merrily by your ear. yes, I had some watermelon, finished some writing, took a nap et voilá! a whole new person.

too rainy today to take any pictures ouside, so - the choice is obvious.

watermelons found here

watermelon. watermelon stands for contentment, refreshed senses and that little something that makes one bite one's lip. just a tad.





seen here

Information overload today (do I still have to call it "information" if it's just a load of crap?) the picture speaks for itself, and yes, even goddesses sometimes use the BS word. 

I didn't mean to be bitter or cranky or ungrateful today, but some of my frustration has to get out somehow. besides, the kitty is adorable. I wish I could remain so resolutely disdainful when I feel cluttered by all the bullshit one sometimes has to take. maybe I will make this a flashcard for truly bs-overload situations, who knows.

anyhow, the weekend is here, and I have longed for it so. to tell the truth, I don't feel poetic or exciting today, just tired, with  acrylic paint on my fingers and a bunch of practical decisions to be made. rather mundane really. yet surprisingly content and slightly determined.

no deep thoughts today, just chillin'.

fine, but I will not wear that bucket on my head!

last week, before I went to see Larry Crowne (Crowne with an "e"), I somehow knew that it would be an evening well spent. Hanks and Roberts, two of my favourite actors, despite what some critics may say, I think they're great and I completely believe them when they tell me a story. And this story was a good one too. a bit out there, yet so real and believable. cliché? maybe. like the human life itself, and therefore so recognizable and sincere. I will probably not rush out and get myself a Vespa anytime soon or start an economics course, or open a thrift store for that matter, yet I have been Mercy, I have definitely been Larry and even Talia. not so posh, but that is what I look for in films - sincerity. it is never too late to learn. and when it comes down to it, leraning to be tough but fair, watching a guy dance in front of your door and riding a scooter are really the things that count.

I was browsing through various 101 thing for 1001 days blogs recently, and while there is something about lists, charts and deadlines, I know myself better than that. Plus, I am not quite sure yet about how private I want to be here, on this oh-so-many-times revisited blogging project. Therefore - something less voluminous, with less structure, something general and personal, without contradicting itself too much: my take on 50 questions that will free the mind 

This will most probably not be a daily thing, mostly for times when I am inclined to go all existentialist. Random Number Generator will help me to be random about the order. Jah, a pun there!

sooo - today it's 11:

question #11 (a long one too):

You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire.  They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend.  The criticism is distasteful and unjustified.  What do you do?

First of all it is hard to imagine that people I respect and admire would come up with distasteful and unjustified criticism. Ok, climbing into the paradigm.. I would ask these people, in a most sobering way possible, why they have these opinions on the person in question. When they fail to reason the criticism, I would make a remark on how dangerous it can be to judge someone whom you don't know, not necessarily stating that the person in question is my friend. And then I would reconsider how much of my respect these people really deserve.



marshmallow bluff

after a weekend of waaay too much tv and a fair share of cough, what better way to celebrate a confusing Monday than marshmallows?

how do I look?
- bloody fantastic