on star stealers and would-be kings

on a day like this I wish I could just put everything down in the best and worst dear diary traditions. Some of my favourite and most respected online authors (sounds better than bloggers to my ear) write about awkward dates, silly arrogant morons, trembling hearts, weak knees, distasteful liars and embarrassing encounters. I don't have the lightness of hand to do that. instead I just listen to princess of china again and again. Coldplay and Rihanna can seem a very unlikely match at first, but they are so good together.

the age of sleep

they always say that you get less sleepy as you get older. even some people of 40 (!) say "you know, I don't need that much sleep longer, I get up earlier now, I sort of wish I could sleep more"
I usually joke about it and wonder when that "age" will come for me. because now it seems that I live in a continuous age of sleep, an era of cruel mornings, endless alarm snoozing and rushed make up. as I am getting older, it only gets worse, my nights are later and later, and mornings more and more difficult. as a kid, I used to be able to roll out of bed on Sunday mornings around 8 or 9 to watch some fairy tale films or cartoons, I took my blanket with me to the tv-sofa, snuggled up, and half slept through the movie. where did I get the motivation... now my weekend mornings don't start until past 11, if I don't have some earlier obligations. and I mean Obligations, that cannot be brushed off. world seems to function according to early risers and morning is the time when i most painfully realize that I am a creature of the night.

a question that will free my mind, vol. 2

a 50 part quest to free my mind. question for this time - #40, absolutely not my favourite one, if I just might add.

so, here goes:

When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?

firstly it would only be fair to admit that I'm not big on marching as such, let alone marching into somewhere, especially the dark. or maybe I have not been lucky enough to have strong beliefs in faint ideas that have soft glow. if I believe in an idea, for me it is more just a soft glow, it is at least a rather strong torchligt. if it is a soft glow, I don't believe enough. and I have to believe enough to walk, or march if you please, into places.

but anyhow, the last time I did it in a big way was a bit more than 3 years ago. unfortunately, belief is not always enough, even if you believe enough...I had to return because my torchlight was not a sufficiently strong companion in the dark. and it was probably all for the best, it has lead me to where I am now, and that is a good place to be. in a smaller way, I have been walking through dull darkness for 1 year, 2 months and 1 day, in a soft light of a belief that this darkness will end. and end it did. however I have to say again - this walk was not in vain, apart from being a path to the place I am now, it brought things and people in my life that I am grateful for.

that's it, no juicy details, just philosophic babble. heh, that's me, deal with it ;)